This Unfinished Puzzle

I can't help but think It's impulsive like your blink I can't just shut it all down With it slowly I'll drown Whats the point in being so shy I want you to know who I am before I die Things aren't as bad as I make them sound I'm always lost, waiting to be found Looking for a way out only in my dreams I'll come up with another one of my crazy schemes Just realize that I am in fact a happy being Problem is, sometimes I'm a little hard of seeing Life has always been so sweet Complaining is to easy a feat Troubles mad heavy so quick Away with them I can't always flick So on them I let my anger brew Sometimes I feel like such a shrew Just know I'm not as crazy as I conclude My thoughts just tend to be rude Why hold it all back The rope doesn't need all that slack I'll be sure and keep it pulled tight I'm not afraid to fight A little conflict isn't all that bad Just realize theres no need to be so sad Used moderately, it strengthens a connection Let it guide you to perfection You can only be happy, if your happy with you Don't let life make you feel so blue Find joy when it is lost Don't be afraid to laugh, no matter the cost Let the troubles roll off your shoulder Pain isn't met to smolder

Make Sure It's Worth The Pain

Effortless I am not But not everything is worth a shot So I set my sights way out far Prepared to raise the bar Every undertaking replenishing my hope Giving me more than I wish to cope With this smile, I can survive Into the deep I'll quickly dive Proving to you is not on my mind I'm focused on leaving things behind Things better left for the past Away with them may I cast Because I'm a walking contradiction My sanity seems half fiction I'm proving me to yours truly I won't bloom with beauty I'm about take off like a rocket Reveal to you the contents of my pocket Just as soon as they appear to me I'll be sure to let you see So don't ask me to decide Or I'll be left unable to abide My life may very well be a lie Honestly, I don't need to know till I die It's making life worth living I'll just keep on giving I don't need it all Still I'll give my all I'm gonna live my life to the entire Maybe to some I can inspire Bring back some lost joy Leave some thoughts for everyone to toy Because life is just a game And everyone wants to be the same So stop seeking recognition It's not all about a great position To much of this happiness is fake I actually see with pain you awake Nobody makes it out alive regardless So be a little more fearless Don't be afraid to make leap Only you know with what you could reap Forget about the worn out track Adventure out into the black

Let Pain Show You

These emotions that break through are relentless Pain always more never less They cut me without repentance Sparked by an ever so minor instance My mind fails to slow down and sleep May it not forever weep I awake with a shakening pain Searching endlessly for gain As I run head-on into these fears Hoping to wipe away these tears Searching for a grip, on this slick slope Only to slip, and lose my hope Foothold seems to be forever lost I wish to find it no matter the cost Because links are beginning to break With these thoughts will my mind ache I lay awake in the dead of night Realizing, I'm my own kryptonite Confidence fading out of view As it's consumed by a nebulous hue Optimism has become my last resort Still I feel it's nothing of the sort As it's slowly stabbed at by it's contender With happiness my heart may never render Confidence found in thes bland accounts I'll work side-by-side with pain as it dismounts As my weaknesses guide me to my fortitude One day I will lay awake, but with gratitude Because I've realized the reason for this scrutiny As I let it pave the way, and show me my destiny

Your almost ready to give in Life's just getting to rough Keep on looking deep within We all know your tough Maybe you just need a little love Or maybe a little slap on your back Well take a look above Because the sky is never black The sun and stars shine bright Stay in search of a cure Let it scare away the fright Your soul may not be pure Then again, no humans may be Don't pursue perfection Happiness is what you must see Let it wash away your infection It could be a gentle touch Or the glow of someones smile You know it means so much Makes it all worth while Because minds get polluted Your thoughts become blind Composure temporarily diluted Still love isn't hard to find Because it reaches out Faith comes with a reward You realize your love is devout Just keep your senses clear Let them guide you through doubt Show to you, were all here

As I lay her and think A while Reflect on every crazy part of life Sort through my mind, an open file Memories pierce me like a knife My reflections start to get heavy Mistakes that have yet to be lost Then happiness holds them back like a levee I won't let this pain prey upon me like frost You can't live life looking through your rearview Otherwise you'll miss what lays ahead Let the hurt remind you how much you grew With realization it will slowly be shed Your the answer to it all Find the joy thats hidden inside Such great issue made small With this no longer will your pain bide

I know I'll go far Really? How far? Well look up at that star I'm gonna fly past Show the world pain doesn't last And that happiness is vast Delight lays in reserve Just roll with every curve Slow down and observe With confidence I'll strive But doesn't the pain thrive? It's simply there to tell me I'm alive I watch as it sits and taunts But it wont hold back from my wants Not matter how persistently it haunts Among it's presence I stay aware For with time it will wear But the load I can bare I won't let hurt control me How? doesn't it sting like a bee? Just stand confident, don't flee Let it all flow together So the bad will become better And my troubles emerge lighter This hurt doesn't unwind Because I persevere and stay kind With that my pain stays in a bind

This hasn't slipped my mind like I hoped it would I don't wanna keep thinking, But I know I should My mind is aching with this stress If I drop this all would there be less? The repetition of this roams through my head Every scary scenario must be shot dead Just as I feel fields of doubt start to fade I find in it's place a nightmare has been made With my thoughts I have no choice but to reason Before I become infected with their poison Should I wait till farther down the road When we may both bare a lighter load Hopes held high the risk is worth taking May it all lay in wait for the making

My hands, they are rough I keep my mindset tough As I walk this unfamiliar trail With a face so pale Fear running through me But I wont let you see Beads of sweat on my brow I will figure out how Confidence strikes me I can find who I'm meant to be In this path less traveled In happiness I will be reveled I'll roll with every blow Even if the going gets slow I'm in pursuit of bliss Better than the sweetest kiss The jack of all trades My talent always fades Knacks never mastered Yet positively altered I find joy quick Still it's so basic True happiness seems rare All a little unfair My life is in the making With excitement I am shaking Constantly being restored Every time I start to get bored I'll find my true skill Working with my iron will Arts left to be honed As each one becomes toned

I slowly breathe in Gasping on this air so thin I'm tearing from within Remembering every sin I want to scream and shout But a word, I won't let out In my beliefs I am not devout My body flows full of doubt These poems are all the same There's no point to this game I have only myself to blame As my head rest in shame These wounds Inflicted with no gain Like I'm working against the grain I lash out in vain So oblivious to this pain The origin of it still unknown Maybe it's not all my own With it's presence I don't condone I shouldn't feel so alone People who care surround me Willing to help for no fee Still I fear they'll flee For my intentions are hard to see

This world becomes so black and white I'm changing for no reason The purpose remaining unknown My mind is fading out of sight Like the change of season Who I am is never shown My abilities never found I don't want to be another shadow Like an echo lost in the dead of night My feet are planted to the ground As I try to escape this sorrow I won't go down without a fight I try tell yell, But I start to choke This fear within in me takes control Your judgement isn't unseen It makes me wish I'd never spoke As your emotions begin to unroll My eyes remain so very keen

My body is filled with hate Because my thoughts, they all negate Rage growing at a dangerous rate This pain is in control As it buries me in this hole Keeping me from every goal I wish to be left alone As my hearts transforms to stone And I step down from my throne Everything has been given Still I am not risen I'm no longer at peace in my skin My thoughts feel so dark Leaving a piercing mark Let me make this my last remark My thoughts become wild As my brain grows defiled This affliction for from mild

My thoughts become so twirled Within these words I yell out As I lay here mad at the world And show to you all, I'm filled with doubt To you all I try to be so frank Yet I'm separated with every thought Emotions fill this page, yet feels so blank For my pain, well it is not sought Strength is present when it need not be Yet when it calls, I am broken Look and that much you will see Words I should have spoken Yell out to me in the dead of night I wonder who is to blame My strength leaves me without a fight No longer can I play this game

Most recent poem, incomplete currently, but close. I cant figure out how to lay it out properly. I'm drowning in slow motion Like I've lost every bit of notion All my troubles have expanded I'm fighting them all left handed Yet I refuse to make a sound My lips are frozen to the ground As if I'm yelling into thin air Covered by this dark despair Around me will darkness stalk Ever so lightly does it talk Stretching over my soul I'm struggling for control Questioning every intention There's to much for me to mention When my past comes into play I know I've lost my way As I feel my hope start to rise They look upon me with despise No matter how hard I try I'm a glare from their eye With a smile ill continue As I remove you from my venue Don't forget your own place As I learn at my own pace Your opinion was never a priority You've simply became a minority In my thoughts so deep They would make you weep